Guess third time is the charm?....so far anyway

So tonight was the third date this month...really I am outdoing myself here and it went really well...I kissed him on the cheek at the end...I couldn't tell if that was hokey or classy...

We met up for coffee and we chatted it up...he's been a lot of places (I love travel!)....he has a dog (meh, I can manage)...he works for Citibank, he's not a serial killer (always a plus in my opinion) and we really got on well. He was a little awkward but in that way I find endearing, it was nice to see he was nervous and not a giant douche (you know what I mean)...he paid for our coffees, we chatted for about two hours, and then he brought up dinner and suggested Thai (I was ravenous at this point so I would have said yes to anything but plus point I <3 Thai)...still more conversation...about music and movies and work and randomness...he drove to the restaurant, I asked if he had any homicidal tendencies I needed to be worried about...he rolled with it and said they weren't skills he picked up yet...I liked the answer so I got in the car...One thing I really appreciated was earlier in the conversation I told him I'm a fidgeter...I had my hands under the table clearly fidgeting...and he was like "you should just be yourself and fidget...I don't mind" I thought it was nice...he told me the thing that caught his eye was my smile...that's very adorable...and he said that my profile was entertaining and that it was written very well (basically I wrote it as sarcastically as possible)

 On the drive back, he pulled out his IPOD, I snooped as he selected a song...eclectic mix...I like it

Back in the parking lot, he asked if he could have my number, so i gave it to him...and he asked if it were okay to call me...i said it was. He asked if we could date again, I said we could...he asked if he could call me before we went on another date...I said of course, I wouldn't expect any less...no date this weekend because I am already booked with Happy Hour, Scrabble Tournament with the boys and Petch's birthday party...so we talked about next weekend...and then he looked at me and I looked at him...and I thought to myself oh why not...so i leaned in to half hug/half kiss and we ended up kissing on the cheek (although i really wanted to kiss kiss him)...and we said goodbye and drove our separate ways...

Maybe online dating isn't all bad...

Bleh...

So I’m in a weird position…I have been in my position about 8 months…but my predecessor is still here…which is uber handy for questions, training, etc because I am the only one in the company that does what I do…however it is super annoying when people consistently defer to her instead of me…or when I give a directive they look to her to make sure I should be saying what I’m saying…that’s the part that’s bullshit. It might be my fault for using her as a mini-crutch for a bit, I’ll admit it was easier to defer to her for somethings or make her the bad guy in some situations but I’ve really been working on finding my own way and making my own mark…maybe it will be easier once she’s gone…only a few more weeks but it really flared up today because I have been sending e-mails and making meetings and making plans and talking to contractors to fix our workforce numbers because it’s become an issue the mayor has noticed. I cc’d one of our VPs on a few things and sent him a direct e-mail…he doesn’t respond, doesn’t look at me, talk to me nothing---instead he goes to my predecessor and wants to talk to her when I’m in the cube across from her…like seriously what the fuck? Like you couldn’t check with me? I’m the author of things and I wanted some real direction…complete. Utter. Bullshit /rant

In other news…I have another blind date tonight…I agreed to do it for a month because I thought my dating skills were sliding off and honestly who doesn’t like a free dinner?…but now I’m just concerned because well in general this entire thing has been a dud…like why are people such creepers? I have been solicited to be friends with benefits, asked to be someone’s wife, and just in randomly awkward social situations…I doubt that non-online dating is much different…I’m just saying...I think this is my last one...let's say second to last cause well the month isn't over yet...

But anyway…so tonight…Adam…he’s in finance…we’ll see what happens, although I’m not too optimistic…okay that’s a lie I am hopeful but history doesn’t predict anything warm and fuzzy…maybe I’ll be wrong and he’ll be great and become my husband…I’ll update tomorrow….provided I’m not putting the lotion in the basket

In case you were wondering

So not that I really cared at this point....I mean seriously?!? I'm not at a point where I am that desperate no matter how compatible we are...if there's no spark, there's no spark...not yet anyway maybe once I'm 30...

Hi Kim.
I'm writing to tell you that I've decided not to pursue anything with you right now. Believe me when I say this was a very difficult decision, but as you know, whether something feels right is beyond one's control. I enjoyed our evening and can tell that you're a beautiful person, and am flattered by your interest in me. If anything changes, I'll let you know, but my life is taking me in a different direction right now. I'm sorry, and wish you the best with everything -- although I'm sure you won't need it!
David

So.....

Got an e-mail from David today

Hi Kim!

I had a good time last night as well -- I figured we both would.  You and I have a lot of common ground and I thought it was a great conversation.

I am not completely sure how I want to proceed from here -- I have been living life at breakneck speed and need some time to reflect on things, hoping that they come more into focus.

I am going to take a little time and will be back in touch, one way or another, before too long.  Does that sound OK?

Talk to you soon,

David 

 

 

Not sure how to feel about it...back to the drawing board?

Blind Date #2...slightly more promising

SO while Neda writes about melting hearts and love, I am writing about the new blind date...it was mildly disconcerting for me because I was really really nervous about meeting David...like I have no idea why I am such a spaz but I am...although as soon as I sat down he was looking at me from across the bar smiling...


Guy : David
Location: Buffalo, NY

Age:28

Kids: 0

Status: Single

Employment: Assistant District Attorney

Height: Taller than me (plus)

Eyes:  dark brown, glasses

Hair: brown/black (some slight balding but I'm short enough not to see it most of the time)

Build:  Average

 Potential for date #2: I think good, but the end of the night was a little strange...so who knows for sure

Highlights: Well we love a lot of the same things: Vertigo; classic Twilight Zone; Mexican Food; helping the community. We both come from similar families (his mom is one of 7, mine is one of 8, both Catholic)...we talked about traveling it's not something he does regularly but he's interested in going different places...when I said I liked Mexican food, he said that meant we would get along well...kind of nerdy but kind of cute...plays basketball...is best friends with my boss' son...the boss that I want to become my father...lives on the same street as my cousins...doesn't seem like he's a killer or that I'd end up putting lotion in the basket...he seems normal as far as I can see...I asked about his new years resolutions and he said he set goals for himself last year that he's still working on, he bought a house, is trying to be more "social" which I of course took to me he's trying to actively date (which aren't we all?) and he said he had a few others (I'm assuming wife, children, etc) but he didn't want to bore me with them (he didn't want to sound like a crazy person which I can appreciate)...he also knew John Kordupel which was really random...he asked if I thought of buying a home...I said I was on the fence...he laughed (he bought a house in June)...we talked about his family he has a older brother;

Lowlights: He laughs really funny....in a nerdy semi-endearing way so maybe that's not a lowlight but the first time I heard it I was thrown off...then there was the end of the night...he seemed anxious all of a sudden and tried to take off, I said I had a really great time and he was like yea me too and I'll be in touch....I can't tell if that's a blow off or not...plus no hug/kiss/high five anything...not sure what to make of it yet


I guess either way at least this is proof that I can have a semi-normal date

Blind Date #1

Borrowing the basic template from A Girl's Gotta Eat    which everyone should read because Shannon is hysterical....here's my first semi-blind date...

Guy : Abraham
Location: Etobicoke, Ontario (but willing to travel for the right lady)

Age:25

Kids: 0

Status: Single

Employment: An entreprenuer (aka unemployed) 

Height: Taller than me (plus)

Eyes:  dark brown, 

Hair: Black (braids) <--minus not a fan of braids

Build:  Average

 Potential for date #2: ummmmm slim to none...unless I am bored/desperate 

Highlights:  None

Lowlights: He kept saying he couldn't wait to be a "hubby"; he didn't believe in having friends (he actually told me I shouldn't have friends because you can't trust them, especially guy friends) or family (he's far from his family and doesn't care), just building his new life with his wife (could it be me?) ---I should add he came from Africa so maybe the foreign aspect has something to do with this...I'm not sure but ti gave me the creeps because I couldn't help but think I could someday either live in the middle of nowhere so we only had each other or would be "putting the lotion in the basket" while I lived in a well. He also kept mentioning that he needed a woman who respected religion...I'm not entirely sure what that means...I explained that I'm spiritual but not exactly religious and I think that was an issue...but he said that as long as my intentions and motives were clear religion wouldn't be an issue... The weirdest (or I guess one of the more weird) comment he made was when he said that life without a spouse is pointless (you're 25 dude!!) and that he isn't really living unless he is with someone....this lead me to believe he is a level 5 clinger and I would again probably end up in the aforementioned well...I love my friends, they are like my family...I love my own space...like who thinks they're nothing without a relationship? Like honestly, if that was the case I haven't been living the past few years....seriously? Like I can picture that becoming a needy relationship which I can't deal with, I need someone who understands that I have a life, I work, I hang out with my friends, I like to travel (sometimes by myself)...I hang out with boys that I have no intention of dating, I just like nerdy boy humor and happy hours...so obviously this one is a negative...let's see what happens tomorrow

Sometimes VPs are Jerkfaces

So yesterday one of the VPs came to me to ask about a sheet of paper (yes one sheet) in a stack of 10 contracts...I didn't know where it was (but knew it was in my e-mail)...I told him I would have to check because I had been on vacation for the past week...He replied that "the world doesn't revolve around me" and that just because "I'm not here it doesn't mean the world stops" I just stared at him because honestly, for all intents and purposes the world does stop...for me anyway...I'm not working from home on vacation...so he clearly knew that what he said was douche-y and today is only speaking to me via e-mail even though he is in the office...

p.s. here's my desk

p.p.s. Going on a blind date on Thursday....that should be a MUCH more entertaining post...I hope

xoxo K